I’m in a better spot mentally than I was last night. The past two days at work haven’t been bad, which is what made my feelings of exhaustion so confusing last night. The RN and I were talking behind the nurse’s desk yesterday after changeover and we both agreed that it felt like we had gotten our asses kicked even though we did extremely well time-wise.

I think the weather plays a role in my overall mood. It’s been cold again. Overcast. It snowed Friday night and into Saturday morning. The roads were awful on the way to work which didn’t make for a great start to the day.

Ox did spend some time with me last night even though he has his kids this weekend. I was grateful for our time together. It helped dissipate some of the tension. I knew a lot of it was most likely from tiredness and that what I really needed was to go to bed. The cuddles and pets helped me let go of a lot of the stress from work, though. It was nice to focus on something other than my obligations and undone tasks.

When I came home last night I had originally thought to write, but after a handful of minutes I realized it wasn’t going to help the way I wanted it to. I, instead, made dinner, ate, then went to bed with the kittens around 7ish.

I vaguely remember Ox calling me since I never sent him a goodnight message. When I spoke to him this morning I asked if we had actually talked last night because I wasn’t sure if I had dreamed it or not.

Ox: I’m pretty sure you fell back asleep before we hung up.

I wouldn’t be surprised if I had with how dreamlike and “unreal” the memory is.

It’s another dreary, overcast, cold day today, but I’m mildly more ok with it. I just got a text message saying the bacon for breakfast is in the oven, so I guess I’m going to go. I’ve reflected on the past month of February, which most likely helps in feeling mentally grounded and present. I’ve fixed my login access for the system my doctor uses to communicate with me, so that’s a major thing already taken care of. I want to do a little bit with the folders we use for D&D and I want to finish up my report for school.

There’s a lot of stuff going on with covid-19, but for now, I don’t want to write about it. I’ve done my catching up for the day. My goal is to be quietly productive before surviving work tomorrow. After that, I have three days where I don’t have to go anywhere since my class is now an online class until further notice.

Here’s to today and recovery and warm cups of coffee.